Shaina, a warrior in the Wastelands
by PassionatePatty
Summary: Shaina finds herself lost in a foreign place with 4 important characters on her tracks, and among them.... Jamian!
1. Shaina, a warrior in the Wastelands cha...

SHAINA: A WARRIOR IN THE WASTELANDS  
  
Prologue It was a rainy night in Athens. The sound of the heavy drops that were falling on the floor of the gym kept a slow, rhytmic beat. The beat that was also in the rhytmic of Jamian's heart. He had been training for two hours, till he had fallen on the floor, sweating, his soul oppressed by a secret. It had to be a secret, he thought, raising his bruised arm and letting it fall again, exausted. I love her, damn'it! I love her and she doesn't even look at me. She screams, she yells at me, she may spit in my eye if she was in blue mood, but she doesn't really know that I'm here.  
  
But it might not be that you only want to...That was an angry, sadistic voice that sometimes whispered in his dreams, in his darkened dreams. The voice that suggested that he didn't really love her, but...  
  
Yes, it's true. It's true. I wanna hear her screaming my name and on and on in anger and pleasure all the way. Fuck me! I'll take her soon and all the misery, the exploitation that I have always suffered in my sugar free life will disappear. And if I don't, well, who knows.  
  
I will kill her.  
  
And it's that all there is about that.  
  
CHAPTER 1  
  
There is a field where Saints and sinners live in Athens. Well, sometimes they catch the first plane for Japan if they are needed there, and the other way round. It depends on the moods of a fright called Saori. Sometimes she bubbles if she didn't have any lovers walking barefoot till her living room, other times bubbles because there were too many lovers that stalked in the night to get a little piece of her majesty Saori. Fuck off her majesty and the whole court too, thought the young girl, taking another sip from a bottle of beer, near an ashtray full of butts. Why, she thought, spreading her arms just like she would choke an imaginary enemy, have I to baby sit a young queen that was a pain in the ass of the Ancient World? Why? She was lying on her bed, pissed off like a tiger in her cage. And the Saints. Yes they got armours and power and all the other things, and then they say yes milady in choir. She knew what Seiya and Quieya and Lewiya lack of. The magical little word. Balls. I'm the only one with a great pair of balls, here. And if that queenie little bitch ordered me something again, I'm gonna split her in two. The reason of this controlled and well mannered anger was simple. The latest stereo system of the little bitch, excuse me, Saori. She had bought the Anastacia's last hit and she was ready to blast the volume in order to make a dog pallet out of the Parthenon, when the right box got out. Result: she got to search in every little filthy alley of Athens to find a technician to mend it properly. And everybody knows that it is very hot in Athens in summer. Fuck off! And the other Saints they were all worried just like Asgard was on the verge to explode. Well, another two ballbreakers, those Asgardian sisters... She thought, trying to calm down a tiny bit, farting for the gas of her tenth beer... That moment, the bell that Saori had ordered to put in all Saint's hovels rang, and it was the sign that she needed Shaina, that was bellowed out in rage. She stood up, and moved fast to the Sanctuary. But a darkened shadow passed over her. If she needs something like a Louis Vuitton bag I kill her, I fucking swear it! Saori was lying on a sofa, drinking an iced tea and listening at a Britney Spears hot number, I guess it was Poison or I will B a slave for U, I don't remember well. A minor knight was cleaning the wardrobe, and another one was tidining the mess that the queen had done raving the night before. "Shaina, my dear, you are the only one that I can trust in this moment." Shaina growled something in answer. The queen giggled:"I guess that you will be absolutely thrilled by this new, but the Coin shop has started the discount shopping today. Now I want you to buy me a list of items that Aiolia has written this morning. And buy a pack of toilet paper also." The rage that was in Shaina chest – and you know, what a chest, eh eh eh – burst out suddendly. The warrior had been wounding herself as a spring for the whole queen's speech and now snapped all at once. With an hand gripped tight as any vice she launched herself against the queen, aiming her eyes. The long, black claws of her, tipped in poison – Lethal Chanel n'5 she had stolen from General Store, ripped and teared the silk of the sofa. The queen started screaming like an air raid siren, an high pitched holler that waked everyones in a three miles range. "You green haired crazy bitch! That sofa costs like your monthly income and more!" "I'M GONNA RIP YOUR TIGHT ASS IN TWO LITTLE STUPID SNOTTY SLUT!" I'm pretty sure you all know what happened next, I think you are familiar with the manners of the palace of Athens.  
  
Commercials  
  
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CHAPTER 2  
  
A very pissed off Saori with a black eye and a scratched cheek sitted on her throne. She waved to the nearest saint to fetch some tranquilisers dipped in honey. "Seiya, how many times I have told you that I don't appreciate acacia honey, I wanna my own mixture of twenty different flavours. Change immediately those pills. I don't like them, I don't like them, I don't like them!" Seiya stood his ground. In his deeply philosophical meditation he had reached the utter conviction that it was unfair that a young girl could get away with murder all the times. So he had decided that the behaviour of her young majesty would need a change as soon as possible. His decision was fiercely firm. But on the other hand, why trouble her again, upperly after a clash with the witch with black claws, A.K.A., crazy bitch with green hair, A.K.A, Ophiucus knight, AKA, Slivering Miss Snake, A.K.A nice piece of pussy... erm, it had happened again. Every single time he thought about her, his cock raised a full hard on in zero time. And one of the principal inconvenient of the official ceremony was that it was quite difficult to find a place where a Knight could satisfy himself imperturbated... He gave a glance at the little pills he held in his right hand, and decided to drop one just to face what was gonna to happen next, while he was stalking back to the ceremony hall. A nice lookaround, nothing to say. The whole packs of Knight of various metals were sorrounding her majesty. Saori was talking loud, giving orders ceaselessly. "I want her back before my eyes, I'll make her a waitress out of her. This is what she deserves!" Camus cleared his throat politely before speaking. "Her majesty, every single knight in this honorable assembly of highest honour would do this job for you, my queen. Besides Shaina is quite a mean, rude woman and she needs some educational advice. Althought..." He looked all around, asking for an helping hand. In answer, Aldebaran spoke a bit louder than his comrade. "if you believe in the Gps system on your Mercedes car Shaina has reached the Wastelands. Nobody knows how she suceeded in doing this, but, well, she did that anyway. I don't like anymore than you, my queen and comrades. And nobody has ever got back from that wild, terrible, scareful place! My queen, you shouldn't decide to send us there...but..." "Coward," Saori hissed, then exploded histerically. "You are just a bunch of cowards in armour more shining than you deserve! Seiya, my tranquilisers!" She breathed heavy, to calm herself down. Then she spoke words of wisdom, like one could expext from the divinity of war and joustice. "Volunteers. I want two volunteers among you. And who gets back with Shaina's head on a stake, well, I can't promise, but he might obtain a new armour. Titanium and platinum mixed with gold. Battery not included." Well, this created a certain amount of uncomfort. There was who had to meet his old auntie, there was who got to clean the house, because of the guests, there was who had booked a room in Riccione for that week end. But two hands were raised in answer...  
  
If you want to know whom hands belonged to, please read the next chapters of "Shaina the warrior of the Wastelands"...by Your Passionate Patty... 


	2. Shaina, a warrior in the Wastelands cha...

SHAINA: A WARRIOR IN THE WASTELANDS  
  
CHAPTER 3  
  
A sea of grass. Hills that rolled all around, in every direction. Highest clouds in a grey sky. A wind, that blowed sharpened like the edge of a sword. By the way, Shaina had never understood why warriors in the Knights of Zodiac, weren't using swords. Every warriors of every single action movies use sword. She longed for a nice sword, a Christian Dior's or Pierre Cardin's one, it didn't matter. Instead they were always babbling about their moves before actually doing 'em, so their duels were quite boring. She had always desired for something faster and more, you know, cruel. For instance, the kind of fighting that happened the day before when she had gone across the border between the Desert of Every Suns and the Steppen of the Wolves, where she was now. On this border there was, or it may be still there, a little town, where Raiders of the Far Ocean and the Bucaneers of Aquilonia met to have their deals. It was called Cartagena. Shaina had landed just a mile out of the walls of Cartagena. She had been feeling a little strange after her flying through time and space, but she was O.K. for the rest. More that O.K., actually. Here was she, ready to take over. To control her life. And if she had had something to drink, she would have felt perfectly O.K. So she headed toward the door of Cartagena, without hesitation, althought she met an old guy that ran with a knife stabbed in his legs, tracked down by another guy that was yelling something in strange language. Clearly, he intented not to leave his work undone. Moreover, another three or four guys were dragging what looked like a reptile, with the hind legs tied in a knot, that was actually speaking. Shaina sniggered. Those weren't her business, so she entered into the town, that shown clearly the signs of a recent battle. Her attention was drawn by a shop that sold coloured clothes, so she discretly got in to check the wares, and to steal a lovely leather jacket that made a wonderful match with her green hair. Then she stopped at a tent where an old merchant, with a skin blue as the deepest sea sold something that Shaina didn't recognize, not immediatly anyway... "Stop with all your complaining, stupid!" exclaimed an exasperated Jamian, that had endured the laments of Seiya for two hours, now. They were walking in the middle of the Wastelands, following Jamian's raven that drawn wide circles in the sky, scanning the horizon to find Shaina. The raven was actually the reason why the two of them had succeeded in following the tracks of Shaina. The nice bird had found a time distortion wide enough to enter in the Wasteland, if it hadn't done that, Seiya and Jamian could have searched Shaina in the whole world, from Washington D.C. to Australia. "I'm not complaining for me, idiot! I'm worrying for Shaina. Don't you get it? She is all alone in this dangerous world, without any friendly face, without an helping hand, without me!" If look could kill Seiya would have been killed right in that moment by Jamian's glance. Seiya was on the verge to kid Jamian a little bit for that, but his attention was drawn by the walls of a town on the line of the horizon. "I think that someone got very angry, here." Devastation reigned in Cartagena. People lying everywhere, knocked out, tents destroyed, houses demolished. Seiya and Jamian walked down main street, looking around, seeing only the results of a strenght that had pounded Cartagena like a battering ram. In a square they discovered a pavilion where a guy called Dave delivered plasters to the people that were there in queue. Everyone shown the signs of a severe beatings. Black eyes, bruised faces, broken arms. Jamian approached one of them. "But what happened here? Seems like you had been struck by the Andrew hurricane and some other tornado together all at once." "I don't remember very much, man. There was this bundle of energy with green hair that moved fast as a lightning all around, crushing everything and everyone." Seiya exploded: "Oh, Shaina, we have found you! How can she survive all alone in this awful place! A shy, tender girl just like her!" "Shut up, idiot," Jamian said, then asked the guy again: "Well, I know that Shaina is a really ballsbreaker with a borderline personality, but what has caused this reaction?" "As I told you, I can't remember very well...a pat on a butt." "Whose butt?" "Well, it ain't true if she has been patted or if she has patted some lad."  
  
In that moment, the raven turned circles in the sky, in its ceaseless searching. But suddendly it went down and disappeared.  
  
Commercials "As the divinity of Sun, I got to be exposed to his rays for ages. But we, inhabitants of Olympus mount, know everything, and in this case, I know how I can protect myself from U.V.A Rays, and to get a superb tanning for the entire year. Abel sun lotion For me, for you, for everyone that has booked a place in the Sun...  
  
CHAPTER 4 Saori's palace, two minute to midnight. Shun and Hyoga were talkin in the hall, both with allucinated faces and uncoordinated movements. Shun was sipping a mug of coffee, smoking nervously a cigarette. "We can't go on like that, Hyoga. Not with her majesty screaming for her nightmares all night long, and the other thing that she does. I can understand the problem, but frankly it's a little...disgusting. And besides it takes a very long time when one got to do that thing. " "You aren't able to relax yourself, Shun, this is your problem." Hyoga, by name and by nature, was sitting on the floor in the lotus position, "and moreover I think that her majesty has nothing to shame of. If you had met Shaina like that, you would have screamed ceaselessly for weeks, I can tell you that." "You can tell the same about you, my friend," answered Shun with a soothing voice, to kid him. "Well, it isn't true, and you know it. I could kick Shaina's ass without any problem, if I needed to." "Like that time when Jamian has kidnapped Saori and we tried to free her, for instance. Shaina beated the two of us up senseless to the ground without even cracking a sweat, if you recall, you smart ass." "But I have been asking the Federation of Knights' Duel for ages to obtain a doping control for Shaina for that time. They have never answered to me. The way she ran on your chain was an illegal movement, I guess. It isn't honest, I'd beg." "But you have never desired to be a chain like that time, haven't you?" said Shun, lighting another cigarette. He has just started smoking for the histeria that reigned in Saori's palace. "As you have desired to continue to play a spring roll with her when she saved you in Asgard from Syd and Bud." "Yes, and that time in which..." "O.K. guys, the water-closet is free," said Camus, going out from the bathroom. "Oh, it's sweet music to my ears" said Hyioga, jumping from lotus position to a race runner stalkin in a instant. Shun lost his position in the queue and lit the whole box of cigarettes for the anger. London fog had never been so thick, believe me. "Damn fucking..." The rest of the words pronounced by Shun in that occasion cannot be written for their vulgarity and are not suitable for a site in which you can't post fics for adults. As you have probably guessed the fear that Saori has suffered for Shaina's attack had caused a little problem with the bathrooms in her palace, it would be too rude explaining better this point. So to say, someone was worried about the water level of the haven of Athens, that was getting higher for her majesty's flush.  
  
Thanks for your attention, and please go on commenting this little work! By the way, feel free to submit grammatic errors you eventually note (pattybraganzayahoo.it is my e-mail, just in case....) Love, love! Your Passionate Patty 


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